Enough Already!

This BECOMING business is tough frigging work.

After all who are you becoming?  What are you becoming?  How do you know if you’ve got there?  Will the skies suddenly open and the one single sunbeam illuminate your path? Will God leave you a massive sticky note saying “Congratulations, you made it?”

I’m asking you these questions as I have asked myself these questions.

This morning a friend popped by and as we were having a cuppa tea she said “You’ve had a challenging few months.  When you keep bumping up against obstacles do you ever feel like saying – I’m on the wrong path let’s just pack it all in, sell the house, move somewhere else and try something new?” 

Hell Yes! 

I am a continual quester of meaning, impact, connection, power, passion and purpose and  you bet I question like a fiend when things are appearing “wrong” (as my mind perceives them). 

I have spent the last 20 years (the first 10 were in closeted denial) looking at myself, my life, the people I attract into my life, exploring my spirituality, studying Yoga, Tarot, following great spiritual leaders, pursuing education, coaching, meditating, participating in sweat lodges, writing New Moon wishes and reading every new book that promised “to be the answer” as to why we are here……..

Yet, I still have moments when it feels that all these new mindsets, ways of being that I am asked to become are too much frigging work and there is nothing tangible to measure!  I mean when you bake a cake you put all the different ingredients in the bowl, stir, bake and voila!  There is a tangible thing. 

So when that feeling hits,  the desire to pack all that learning, BEcoming and Transforming into a huge arsed duffle bag, weigh it down with large rocks and dump it at the bottom of the ocean and go back to being comfortably oblivious, packed neat and tight in a little box scream out to me as sensible.

But you can’t – there is no going back, there is no hopping off the bus.

Can you take a temporary hiatus and give yourself permission to just BE for a bit and not stretch and grow?  You bet.  Will you want to stay there long – most likely not, even though it has the illusion of comfie associated with it. 

  

Why?  Because you are you, you can hear the whisper of your soul calling to you.  You can hear the little voice, that sometimes you stuff deep down, asking you to believe in you and your dream and you intrinsically know in the core of your being (whether you shout it loud and proud or not) that you have a gift that you need to unpack and share. 

Dr. Wayne Dyer talks about the word “transformation” in his book Wishes Fulfilled:- “The word transformation has the word form right smack in the middle, preceded by trans – meaning going beyond form.  Live from the place that will indeed take you way beyond the limits of your seemingly limited life.”

Thus, when you are envisioning the duffle bag  this is the point where you need to remind yourself that as you make changes whether subtle or overt the first thing that comes up is the dirt.  Think of the seed you plant in your garden, as it grows and sprouts all the dirt has to be pushed out of the way.  What about the gym routine you finally commit to and about week 2 all the old crap in your head is going to find every reason why you shouldn’t be there.  

So when the old ways of being, the old habits, the old mindsets rear up, gently embrace them and then punt them to the curb!

So yes the bottom line is Transformation and BEcoming is frigging hard work, but it’s a process, a journey and instead of being focused on the end result, relax, breathe and give yourself time to integrate all the glory of who you are right now and who you are BEcoming.

Because the world needs you, your gifts and your journey of BEcoming.